By Mary O’KEEFE

The pandemic has made isolation the norm for almost two years. It has affected people in different ways and has been especially hard on children in school. This is the time they learn how to socialize and enjoy being young with their friends with many making lifelong friends.

While parents struggled with online learning, in some cases becoming the in-person teacher, it might be easy to miss from their child signs of mental health issues.

Although there have been several reports concerning a spike in teen suicide, 2020 studies have yet to be released though it should be noted that youth suicide has been on the rise in the U.S. for the last decade.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) released a study that stated, “Beginning in April 2020, the proportion of children’s mental health-related ED [emergency department] visits among all pediatric ED visits increased and remain elevated through October [2020]. Compared with 2019, the proportion of mental health-related visits for children aged 5 to 11 and 12 to 17 years old increased approximately 24% to 31%.”

However, the CDC added the proportion of children’s mental health-related ED visits during March through October 2020 might be artificially inflated as a consequence of the substantial decrease in overall ED visits during the same period.

It is important for parents to keep the lines of communication open with their child. After someone dies by suicide, it is often heard that the signs of trouble were never seen.

“One of the things I would say is that we always want to take suicidal threats seriously,” said Amoret Kaufman, licensed marriage and family therapist. She has a private practice in Montrose where she works with individuals and families on “the Triple As” – anxiety, attention issues and ACEs [adverse childhood experience].

“Almost everyone [at some point] has had suicidal thoughts,” she added.

She said that there are those who go beyond having suicidal thoughts and actually have intent, and even a plan, on how to die.

“When someone has a plan,” she said, “that is a different level.”

Kaufman advised always being direct, to use the word “suicide,” when talking about the subject.

“It basically takes it out of the shadows. Saying the word ‘suicide’ [makes it no longer] taboo,” she added.

When a child has suicidal thoughts, or may be dealing with depression, it is important to use “straight talk” about these types of subjects. Kaufman added this is true for people at any age. It is also important to make certain the parents, and/or guardians, let that person know they are important.

For children who have been through this last year of virtual learning and isolation, parents and/or guardians should reassure them that they are not alone and that what is happening is a part of life that could not be anticipated.

Kids who are high achievers usually want to be in control; COVID-19 has thrown away that ability to control.

“We can’t control everything,” Kaufman said adding this is a point that can be shared with a child.

Parents can also remind their child they are not the only one who has been going through this bad year, or years, at school.

Also, she advised, “Let them know [their generation] are pioneers. They know what it is like to recover from a pandemic,” Kaufman said.

There is also concern for some students who struggled in their classes, undecided about their college future. Many students have taken a year off rather than attend college online and now will join the next class of students who will be applying for college. This doubles the pressure to get into a college.

This is another type of fallout from the pandemic that could not be controlled and another opportunity for parents to remind their child that they do not have all the answers but they are available for their child.

Finally, parents who have kids who talk about suicide and show signs of distress should take those signs seriously. Some parents say their child is reacting this way to get attention.

“That is correct, but why do they need attention?” Kaufman asked.

Which leads back to open communication and bringing the talk about mental health out of the shadows.